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Odin Has A Green Thumb…..Sorta.

So I have been following this Goth Gardening group on Facebook, and after being extremely jelly of all the wonderous spooky witchy gardens, found this little guy at a Five Below:

Which is perfect, because I live in a little tikes house with no yard or reasonable windowsills where the cats can’t get at.

Hopefully this journey will be fruitful…..despite the fact that I have killed moss in the past…

Since Cacti are meant to be low-maintenance, I suppose it will be a good starter plant. SO I GOT TO WORK:

You would not believe how many of those beads I have…

I follow the instruction on the manual, put the magic dirt tablets in a container to pour water on top of. Spill dirt everywhere because the container was too smol. Put mess in bigger container, thenput resulting mess into skully pot.

Then it came to opening the seed packet:

Holy shit, I read the back of the packet and these are supposedly saguaro seeds. If true, I thought it fascinating that these tiny doots can create those giant monoliths in the desert. (Yes I know those take centuries to get that tall and no I am not expecting mine to get that big unless there are vampires in the area who could help me out.)

My hope is that when I die my cactus will live on and overgrow through whatever home I happen to be living in and tear it apart like in a post-apocalyptic battleground

I carefully CAREFULLY tucked the buggers into the soil and did not lose a single one. I work with side 15 seed beads. Imma profesh.

Covered in plastic wrap put it in a window and BOOM:

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MAKE ME PROUD, SON! ;_;

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They grow up so fast *sniff*

Anyway. Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

I am still searching for an appropriate name for him. Something antiquated like a bastard noble or a rogue rapscallion. idk.

He’s not even gonna germinate for another 1-3 months, so if you want progress on him, follow me on Twatter.

UPDATE: this inevitably led me down an internet rabbit hole and one cutting and a pack of seeds later, I am now drowning in terrarium options.

For those of you curious, I got a pack of these:

https://www.etsy.com/listing/511098742/echeveria-cante-rare-succulent-10-seeds

And one of these jelly bois:

https://www.etsy.com/listing/633758237/haworthia-cooperi-rare-korean-succulent

HALP I CAN’T DECIDE WHICH TERRARIUM TO BUY! Thoughts?

https://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wishlist/17FNANMETUAO4/

I am gonna spookify the SHIT out of this thing whichever one I get

I ALSO HAVE A GOPHER SKULL I CAN PUT IN IT!!!

…then mebbe buy something to grow out of its eyeholes…

THAT IS ALL!

UNTIL NEXT TIME!

<3 Odin

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